Thursday 22 May

Not a bad day today, after an average night when I was woken up twice by either pain or lack of feeling in the wrist and fingers. The strategy I have adopted is to constantly stimulate the wrist, palm and fingers through deep massage and rubbing; this seems to help with the stiffness and intensity of the shooting pains. Deep massage with my left hand can be quite painful, especially on my recalcitrant middle and little fingers, and over the scar but it brings blood into the hand and seems to short circuit the skin sensitivity and burning sensation. As soon as I feel the burning pain starting to ache, I rub vigorously the area; when it is over the scar, it can be excruciating but I persist because after 2 or 3 minutes the pain diminishes and the tissues seem to regain some suppleness and as a consequence the pain is alleviated and does not become as intense. It also gives me a feeling of retaining some control over these pains, which really helps.

Another thing it does, I think, is to keep my brain aware of my right hand; I have a feeling that these constant reminders help reconnect the brain with my hand.

Constant movement and rubbing also help me use my hand more during the day, but it is a constant battle and I cannot let it stay idle for too long, have to stay vigilant, it’s a bit like being at war with your own hand/brain and trying to stay one step ahead on them.

This diurnal battle actually helps the nights; my hand was a bit more supple this morning than usual, less discoloured and more ‘irrigated”, more responsive when I woke up, it took less time to wake it up.

Exercises today:

- forced extensions

- slow extension and flexion with weight (1 kg)

- throwing darts

- dribbling and throwing/catching ball

- rice manipulation

- pushing away from wall

plus I started doing “push-ups” against wall, standing up, with my hands at shoulder level; a bit awkward but OK. My right shoulder and elbow are still hurting so this was my way to try to give them a workout.

I have also started carrying a 2.5 kg weight in my right hand with the arm extended along the body. I have read that helps the brain’s awareness of the hand.